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| Gender Envy — Orchestra |
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Verse 1: [Men:] I'm a man, a simple man, And girls are jealous 'cause I can do what I can. On the job, it's true that they Work as hard but I'm the one with more pay. Verse 2: Giving birth, I'll never do, And being thoughtful earns me extra credit, too; I can belch, and open jars, And mechanics tell the truth about my cars. Chorus 1: [Women:] Oh, it makes me shriek, That you need only one suitcase for a week. Wrinkles on your skin, Just look distinguished and so masculine. Verse 3 [Men:] Pairs of shoes, I have but three, One wallet and a pocket knife, enough for me; [Women:] Choc'late bars are just your snack, But to us they are an aphordisiac. Chorus 2: [Women:] You just wear your clothes, No falling straps and no runs in your hose; You can go shirt-free, And if you need to, you pee behind a tree. Verse 4 [Men:] Wedding plans get made somehow, I just show up in rented tux and take a vow; I wear shorts where're I please, Even if I have bow legs and knobby knees. Chorus 3: [Men:] We can hit one store, And buy our gifts on December 24; And, we do not burn, If we don't get a nice gift in return. Verse 5 [Women:] You are men, you make demands, But without us you'd all have very calloused hands; There is one – thing you ain't got: Feast your eyes, you guys, 'cause this baby's hot. [Kick-tempo music] [Men:] Wow, you are women, There's no doubt you're women You have our heads swimmin' It's clear, thru and thru, You're women, All elegance, beauty, glamor and glitz; And we love standing here, Contemplating your – your benefits. Ladies, spectacular ladies, We'll fix your car, ladies, Open a jar, too. Oo, we're humble, And tho we might stumble, Dear ladies, we tumble for you. [Dance sequence] |